Cornered

Day FOURTEEN

I always love taking the 5:30pm on Fridays because I feel bikram is a perfect way to segue from the work week to the weekend.  It forces me to leave the office promptly at 5pm on a Friday but sometimes when the subway is running slow due to train traffic, getting to the 5:30 class can be nerve wracking.  Today, I got to the studio with just 4 minutes to throw my stuff in a locker full of women getting out of the earlier class, change, gulp down my ZICO, set my mat and towel down, and run to the bathroom.  I could've asked people to move to make a spot for me but since I was pressed for time, I took the only spot that was wide open, in the hottest part of the room, front room, in a corner.  I still had to run to the bathroom and I thankfully came back in time that Kara allowed me in just as she was about to start pranayama (people already had their hands glued to their chin).

This morning, I had a one hour conversation with my colleague to finish hashing out what we didn't discuss yesterday.  I simply wanted to discuss the facts, clear the air, and be done with it.  That didn't happen.  She is a colleague and a friend and in some ways, I felt like this conversation was akin to a therapy session.  Ugh!  I understood better where she was coming from and I hope to learn to be more aware and sensitive to her next time.  I tried to explain my perspective and tried to reassure her that what I did was not personal and that she was taking it a little to the extreme.  I don't know if I got through.

My little corner was hot hot hot and I was losing focus by the floor series.  The class was packed, at least 50-60 people.  There were 2 inches between my neighbor on my right and on my left, I was directly next to the wall.  I had to move over to the right for half moon bend to the left and for full locust, forget it.  I couldn't stretch my left arm out at all.  I had to skip the first set and move to the left and slide down my mat so I could get some space.  It was totally annoying.  My right knee pain showed up again in both sets of awkward so I had to put my hands to the floor again.  It was painful but thankfully not as painful as Wednesday when it spasmed.  By head to knee pose, close to the end, I just wanted the class to be over.  My hair was all over my face and trying to be still/not push the hair away was driving me bananas.

I got home and for the first time ever in my entire time I've done bikram yoga, I didn't feel rejuvenated or refreshed.  In fact, I was a cranky biatch as if I was PMS-ing (I'm lucky because I don't have PMS so I can only imagine this is what PMS-ing is like?) for a good two hours.  And my lower back is killing me!!!!!!!  It is so incredibly sore, I am walking around bent over like the Hunchback of Notre Dame with my hands on my lower back the whole time.