How Do You Feel?

There it is...the diploma. I had a couple of colleagues with PhDs check it out to make sure it was real.

Everyone at work has been asking me how I feel. Quite frankly I feel numb. Of course, I'm relieved to be done but these last few weeks have been so emotionally taxing that I have nothing left in me. Between my own process and supporting MoJo through his, I'm WIPED OUT.

If you told me that I just won several million dollars from the lottery, I'd probably just say, "OK." It doesn't help that I'm trying to shake a cold that's stuck around for almost 2 weeks. I just need to rest. My body is just tired. I think I need a vacation.

My turn today!

My convocation was today, MoJo's yesterday...as you can see by the pics below.

On the subway early this morning en route to campus wearing our academic regalia. I thought we were sooo cute in our somewhat matching robes. Some people smiled and even wished us good luck. How often do you see peeps in graduation robes on the subway? LOL

After my ceremony...mom and I decided that MoJo looks like Christopher Columbus in his funny hat.

Here's my proud momma and me later at Mama Mexico. Yum!
Holy shitake!!!

I'm...err...we're DONE!!!
I can return to having some semblance of a life!

Dave Matthews Band...

Is there a Doctor in the house?

Even though he's a Doctor, he still rides the subway! :0

That's right honey, hang on to that tree and keep drinking!


So proud of MoJo!!!
I especially like him in his funny hat.

Introducing for the First Time: DR. MoJo!!!!

BEFORE the doctoral dissertation defense
(no smiles here, just lots o' tension)

2 1/2 hours LATER,
when his five committee members said he passed
(he's finally smiling!)

There was a lot of this going on throughout the day
after gaining his new "Dr." cred

I've never seen a man so concentrated with his drink before! :0 Too bad Dr. MoJo is much more shy than me. I would be dancing on top of a bar if I went through a doctoral dissertation defense successfully!

Congratulations honey!!!
I'm sooooo incredibly proud of you!!!

Thesis FINALLY Emailed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

George Michael Fre...

OMG. I can't believe it. I just emailed it to my two readers. It's late and I'm giving them precious few days to review it. I sure hope that they just pass me. Ugh.

OK, so I know it's a bit premature but I don't care. I'm celebrating. First, a happy dance. Then some wine. Then bed. I'm so exhausted that I can't see straight...but not too exhausted to shake my booty for 3 minutes!!

I've had this George Michael song runnin' through my head these last two weeks as I've tried to intellectualize Filipino balikbayans and balikbayan boxes. It's been a living hell, lemme tell you. I would NOT recommend working full-time and pursuing part-time graduate study if you can somehow help it. These last 3 weeks SUCKED!! Actually, these last 2.5 years have been pretty rough. Be prepared to say goodbye to your life.

Hopefully, in two weeks, I'll get to say hello to my life again!! YEAH! FREEEEEDOM!!!

Fridays Off

Taking Fridays off between now and early May to write that MA thesis that is due in time for a May 16 graduation.

Still trying to hammer out my conceptual framework when discussing Filipino American immigrants (referred to as balikbayans, Tagalog words balik=to return & bayan = home) and their persistence in sending balikbayan boxes back to the Philippines to their families.

Even though my brain often feels fried, I get great joy out of writing. I never thought in a million years I would've said that. Talk to me in May when my a** is dragging on the floor. I may being singing a different tune!

Blame it on the Commute

I just discovered why I am always late in submitting my papers in graduate school. I had my eureka moment on the subway coming home. It's the travel time! When I was an undergrad at MHC, the walk time to my professor's office mailbox was easily calculated. No forseeable delay, no acts of God, no transportation to deal with, just my good old two legs. These days, I have to schlep on the train to drop off my paper and I'm blaming the NYC MTA, the slow walking peeps on the sidewalk especially since now's the season to tote incredibly large shopping bags, the traffic lights, you name it!

My train painstakingly took far longer to get into the city than usual as it crawled slowly through the tunnel underneath the East River. I arrived 2 minutes after 5pm at the NYU Anthro Department building and it was already locked. It's the Friday before Christmas -- who was I kidding that somebody would somehow still be there.

Nonetheless, I'm a free woman...for now. Went and had myself a Sapporo with my sushi at Enju after I dropped off my paper. MoJo has already gone home for the holidays. And my classmates, well, no one took me up on my offer to celebrate the handing in of our papers with drinks.

My focus now turns to Christmas and finally to Maui. But first, sleep.

The Red Pegasus Connection

Last night was the last class of my anthro course on comparative diasporas at NYU. It's been a great class and I must admit that I've taken a liking to my NYU classmates for than my Columbia ones. Don't get me wrong. I think Columbia students are totally fine but a bit more conservative than I care for. My NYU classmates had a bit more flare, a bit more hipness, a bit more of that "it" that makes one interesting. Two were doing film projects, while others had really cool former lives before graduate school. Of course, it may have a lot to do with the positionality of the universities themselves which affect the type of students it attracts.

Wouldn't you know after a semester of sitting with these folks, I chatted up with a woman who I find out went to Mount Holyoke! We couldn't believe our ears and stared at each other in amazement for several seconds (You see, I was such a big proponent always being cognizant of a gender analysis on all our assigned readings, which I attributed to my women's college background). She graduated in 2002, which meant that when I graduated in 1998, my class passed on to her class our color (red) and our animal (the pegasus). This tradition, like many at MHC, means to connect women of various classes and generations. And in this case, it did! It never ceases to amaze how MHC women are everywhere and how are varied backgrounds and interests get transcended by the mere fact that we all share a common experience of having attended MHC. A network of 33,000 women around the world is indeed a powerful thing!

Unable to linger after class, I had hopped in a cab and zipped down to SoHo for the holiday party hosted by the architectural firm that MoJo consults for. Giorgione Restaurant had your typical SoHo feel: loft-like with an industrial bent yet warm and most certainly hip. I finally got to meet the people that he talks about and I think his colleagues, particularly his boss, were quite curious about me. By the end of the night, I think we managed to both get to know each other a bit better. If by chance you go, the food there is very good. I had the seabass wrapped in parchment -- it was light, fresh, and delicious.

First Paper IN

Managed to get that first paper on gifts and gift exchange handed in...and on time to boot!!! For some reason, ever since I started graduate school, I could never meet my deadlines. I always handed the paper hours after, and in one case, two days after it was due. Oh well. The world still turns. A special thank you to Mojo for printing the paper and actually walking it over and putting it in my prof's mailbox. Thank goodness he's been at Columbia the entire time I've been there. And I'm even more thankful that he's willing to wait around on days like today and act as my messenger. I couldn't have handed in all my papers in grad school without him. Thanks cutie!

I've learned to not worry about it so much. Grad school classwork deadlines are not the end of the world and professors don't seem much to mind. I think they've got their own shit to worry about. I've discovered that profs understand all too well the concept of being overwhelmed. I'm surrounded by former profs so I see upfront that, hey, they are human after all!

Came home and slept for five hours. My body was thankful. Totally forgot that I was supposed to help my mom see The Acupuncturist. Oops. She did fine without me. He told her to find some hobbies. I think that's a great idea -- I've been telling her to do that all along but she hasn't seemed to want to listen to me in the past. I'm just the daughter, you see. What do I know? Mom now sees though that I know a thing or two about life. :)

Now I'm wide awake and its 2:30 am. What to do? Maybe I'll go raid the fridge and fix myself a snack.

The Countdown Begins

no, not to christmas.

5 days left to hand in my first paper. the topic is on gifts, gift exchange, and commodity consumption particularly for members in the filipino diaspora.

12 days left to hand in my second paper. for this one, i theorize on the filipino diaspora and argue that (im)migration is a process which causes a social death and re-birth for the (im)migrant.

these two papers will eventually be two sections of my MA thesis. this is my first stab at writing the thesis. i need to submit a first draft in march. "march madness" will have a whole new meaning for me in 2007.

i want to pomp & circumstance in may. no question about it. i'm tired of not having a life. i'm tired of sacrificing. i'm just plain tired.

how's that for honesty?

To pursue the PhD or not?

Met with the Archaeologist today for morning coffee. He's really got me excited about my work on the Filipino balikbayan box. He was shocked that I did not want to pursue the PhD and encouraged me to consider it since he believes that I can make a new and exciting contribution to the intellectual conversations on the immigrant experience and that this MA thesis can easily become a PhD thesis.

Nooooooooooooooooooo!!! Virtual poverty, more school, no benefits in my 30s?!?!?! I don't know. I've got to really think this through.

Week of Hell: Finals

So my body feels like crap owing to all this crazy stress. I know what it feels like to be at 100% vitality (a unit of measurement used by The Accupuncturist) where it feels like I have tons of energy, my body is humming, and I'm whistling out loud on the street cuz I just feel so damn good. When I feel this good, it's like I'm flying (no seriously, sans drugs just needles)!! Right now, I feel aches in my muscles and my joints are creaking like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz, and my injured shoulder is back thanks to my lifting my heavy laundry bag and carrying it like Santa Claus two blocks to my local laundrymat a week ago (you will not believe how much I would give for a washer and dryer in my apartment right now). I could kill myself for being so careless!! I should've known better.

Tried to push up my appointment with The Accupuncturist and I can't get one!!! I like seeing him at the end of the day cuz I don't feel rushed since there's no one after me. He's gotten so popular...in part, thanks to my recommending him to so many people. Folks have seen how good I've been looking these past few months and have asked my secret. Silly me. I told them it was him. Seven people have now seen him, thanks to my referrals! Shit. So no good deed goes unpunished. I mean, I'm really happy for all of us taking charge of ourselves to be healthier people. But this sucks that he's getting popular!!!

Breathe JoJo. Breathe. Note to self: Must learn to share and get over your only-child mentality.

*sigh* Got two papers, both due on May 12. One on the balikbayan box and the other on Karl Marx and his labor theory of economics. Shite!

Ok, I can do this. I can get through this.

Acceptance, submission, surrender. All these attitudes are key to my well-being. This is my journey. I have to embrace it with love.

Remember the light at the end of this week's tunnel. Visualize 3 weeks in Costa Rica in July: surfing, volcanoes, ziplining through the cloud forest, the incredibly diversity of animals and plants, the beaches. Remind myself of how incredibly blessed I am to have the opportunity to study a discipline that really fascinates and excites me, that I have the intellectual capacity to critically analyze and cogently write about topics that interest me, that I have an amazing job that supports me, and that I ultimately have the physical and mental capacity to heal myself and get through this pain.

Perhaps I should re-phrase the title of this post to "Week of Acceptance, Submission, and Surrender".

Publishing in an Academic Journal?

My professor, The Archaeologist, for my material culture class has enjoyed the essays I've written so far on the Filipino balikbayan box that he has suggested that I try to get them published. WTF!! Whoa, really!?!?!?! A lowly MA student such as myself, get published in an academic journal? I can't believe it. I'm definitely going to follow through and look into it. I feel so validated thanks to The Archaeologist's encouragement.

Rejected by Prof D

There was an email in my inbox basically saying that I didn't make the cut for the Anthropology of Violence class. Guess Hobbes, Nietzche, and the remaining clan are shelved for this semester.

Sent an email to The MA Advisor to see if she'll let me into her Principles of Anthropology course even though at first, I requested to place out of it because I felt it would be redundant for me when in fact, I wanted to be available to take the Violence class. I got rejected.

Logistically, I want both my classes to meet on the same day so that I only have to travel to CU once a week from work. The only class that could support this original plan is to take the Principles class. Sometimes, you just have to come crawling back...

First Day of Class, My 2nd Semester

Although I was dredding the first day of class, I suprised myself at how much I actually enjoyed it. See, I'm an official bonafide geek who just loves the first days of school as I tote around new school supplies and shop for unweathered and unmarked books. I'm also a true Aries who always loves the feel of new beginnings.

I signed up again for two classes since it's all I can handle as I work full-time. Four more semesters of part-time classes and full-time work. The end seems like an eternity away.

My 1st class, The Anthropology of Violence, was gravely overcrowded. Thirty students showed up and the professor hoped only for 15. He should've put a limit on the class during registration but he didn't; now he has to figure out which 15 he wants to keep. So now I wait for word. We all had to write down our year, the program we were in, and our background in social theory. This class is heavily inundated with the modern (defined by Prof D as post-Descartes) Western philosophers such as Hobbes, Locke, Rousseau, Hegel, Nietzche, Foucault. I'm a little intimated since I've had minimal exposure to their writings and this class is a lot of work. But I'm up for the challenge. I'm planning to no longer have a life any longer this semester anyway.

I await to see if I made the "cut". If not, there won't be any love lost. I've already got another class as a back-up.

My 2nd class, Race & the Articulation of Difference, was rockin'. So much correlation between the events in New Orleans and the readings we are assigned. I really look forward to this class.

MoJo has already waved good-bye to me since he knows how busy I can get. I will try to be better about managing my time. I am committed to eating healthy and exercising daily. I am committed to having down time especially with my family, friends, and MoJo.

Keep your fingers crossed that I don't lose my sanity!

It's over!!! I survived the semester

Took my last classes today and handed in my two papers before these final meetings.

I can't believe I made it. I'm exhausted...killed myself these past few weeks. I didn't think I could cross the finish line this semester but I somehow pulled through.

It's going to take me a few weeks to recuperate. I have to do this for another 2 years?!?!? Crap!

First Day of Classes

Today was my first day of graduate classes at Columbia. I haven't been in a classroom in 7 years and I have to admit, it was exhilarating to be sitting around a small table and exchanging ideas and opinions with a group of people and with a professor to lead us.

With 7 years of life experience, I see how this has already enriched my learning in the classroom. I felt so giddy that I was uber conscious of my feelings. I felt like one of those "older" students, with always something to say and therefore always contributing to class, not afraid to sit next to the professor, and gets ahead in the readings! *ick* I know, just call me a nerd...go ahead. I always have been and am proud of my nerd status.

My classes are interesting: the first is Anthropology and the Philanthropic Project (which understands how the discipline of British and American anthropology was shaped due to funding from private foundations and governmental agencies) and the second is Black Revolts in the Modern World (which historically examines black social movements throughout the world to combat slavery, sexism, civil rights, etc. and how radical black intelligentsia is formed).

Okay, enough anthropological babbling...more to come! Thanks for reading!

Acceptance to Columbia University!

I received a wonderful present on New Year's Eve: there was a "thick" envelope from Columbia sitting in my mailbox. I ripped it open and discovered a letter of acceptance to the MA program in Anthropology. I was thrilled! The department's rich history and legacy is comprised of former faculty members like Franz Boas, Margaret Mead, and Ruth Benedict (among others) who were central in shaping the discipline as we know it today. I am honored to be a part of the tradition and to walk in such distinguished halls. Hooray!!!

Classes start next week and I plan on attending part-time (taking 2 classes per semester) while I continue working full-time. I will quite a tired and busy (!) lady these next 2.5 years but I know my hard work will be worth it.

Thanks everyone for reading my good news!